Life Lately

A few days ago, Janesse and I were talking about back in the day when we used to blog and it made me want to start it up again. I do love handwritten journals, but sometimes typing is just easier, honestly.

So here I am. It's 11:30pm and everyone is sleeping. I was just in the bath (when I'm pregnant I am obsessed with taking baths and usually take at least 2 a day haha) and thinking about how this baby is going to be here soon. I am 36.5 weeks pregnant and will likely have this baby in the next 3 weeks. While I'm so beyond excited, I'm also really sad. I'm sad because Grayson won't be my baby anymore - yeah, now I'm here on the couch sobbing - and I'm sad because this will likely be our last baby. Which means I'll never get to be pregnant again, never feel the little kicks and rolls inside of me, never get to have a cute snuggly newborn, etc. I know I'm getting ahead of myself, because I will literally have a cute snuggly newborn in a few weeks, but you know what I mean. I just love babies so much, so it's hard for me to imagine just being done. But Heath always tells me "You have to stop at some point. You can't just keep having babies forever." And I guess he's right. But still. 

(34 weeks pregnant in this picture)

Anyway, I'm feeling very emotional about Grayson not being my baby, but he's also the cutest little boy I've ever met in my entire life. He is at such a fun (and wild) age right now and I love it. His little voice is so cute when he talks, he thinks everything is funny (like saying "poopy bummy" which I hate haha), and he doesn't ever like to sit still. He's such a busy little guy! He picked up some scissors today and started to cut some paper for the first time - with safety scissors, don't worry - and it was adorable to see him concentrate so hard on it. Whenever he is concentrating on something, he sticks his tongue out. He also still takes his pink "tebby" with him pretty much everywhere. It's so funny to me how much he loves that teddy bear. My mom got it for me in the hospital gift shop after my thyroid surgery in 2014, and so nostalgically, I never got rid of it. It has just been in our bin of toys for years, and the girls never took an interest to it. Well one day, Grayson picked it up, and pretty much hasn't let it go since. He loves the silk tag and bow tie on the bear, and always has to be holding the silky part when he is sucking his fingers to go to sleep. I wonder how much longer he will have that bear. Honestly, it has seen better days and is getting pretty ratty and faded. I'm nervous for the day that it eventually rips or gets lost or something. I have tried to find a backup just in case, but I haven't found anything similar enough, and also, I don't think he would even accept a backup at this point.

In other news, I decided to homeschool Evelyn this year. Call me crazy, I know. If you had ever asked me in the past if I would be a homeschool mom, I would have laughed in your face. I never thought I was that kind of mom or had enough patience to homeschool, honestly. But here we are. There wasn't anything that catapulted this decision, really. She is doing great in school, loves to learn and read, was making friends easily and doing great socially. I just had a few friends talk to me about choosing to homeschool and after researching it more, I felt like it was the right decision for us at this time. It's kind of weird timing though, because I'm literally about to pop out a baby... and we are living at my parents' house while they are on their mission in order to save money for our next house... but it felt right so I had to do it. I really do have to figure out the whole work situation - if I will go back to work at all - at some point haha but I just needed to make one decision at a time. I will figure out the work thing when my maternity leave is up. (I'm hoping they will let me work from home for the most part, or maybe I will be able to find a different work from home job so we can bring in and save as much money as possible during this time. But that's future me's problem I suppose.) Here are a few pictures from our first official day of homeschooling. Evelyn was very excited about it leading up to our first day, but this week has shown some apprehension. I think she is just unsure of the change and the fact that it is so different from regular school. But I think it has gone well so far. She wants to learn more about dinosaurs, so next week we are going to put a focus on that and then go to the Dinosaur Museum as a "fieldtrip", so I think that will excite her. Jossi starts preschool in a few weeks, but on the days she is home, I will have her do a few things with us as well. She has loved doing school work and asks to do worksheets every day. Even Grayson wants to be involved, so I got him a few busy books and puzzles so he can feel involved too. 

Overall, life is really good. We are so blessed, and have so much to be thankful for. Mom and Dad are letting us stay in their gorgeous home rent free (we just pay the utilities), all of our kids are happy and healthy, Heath has a great job at SRP, and we are about to welcome another perfect baby into our family. I do miss my parents though. And I am sad that they won't be here when the baby is born. But I suppose this is their 40th grandkid, not their 1st, so it's not as big of a deal to them haha! But look how cute they are. They are in Albania for a year for their mission. I'm so proud of them and love them so much!

Anyway, hopefully I will be updating this and documenting our life more than I have been in my physical journal. I swear, my posts in my journal are so sporadic, so hopefully this will be better. 

It's past midnight now, so I should probably try to get some sleep. Even though my sleep has been terrible lately. I have the worst insomnia when pregnant, plus I wake up about 8 times a night to pee and then when I get back in bed, I can't ever seem to get comfortable. So wish me luck.